A Newbie's Log

[Rippy]

Alright so this will just be basicly what I have learned and practiced every day. =) Probably won't be very interesting but if you'd like to comment feel free to. ^^;

May 05--
I was super busy so I didn't do much psi-related things today. I would now but I'm so tired I'd pass out. )'= I think I may have manipulated some birds at the wildlife rehab while I was volunteering. These baby Grackles were annoying the crap outta' me by trying to peck me and diving for the entrance of their cage. So I calmed myself down (It was insanely stressful, they're also veryyy loud birds) and focused on.. well I'm not exactly sure, but I think I was sort of.. sending emotions of exaustion to them? Well, they immediantly calmed down and shut up. =)

Besides that, I haven't done anything today. I'll probably be busy tomorrow too.. bleh. I procrastionate too much. Hahaha. xD;

[Rippy]

Eh, I forgot about this. Anyway. Today I worked on controling my empathy, because I was constantly picking up on everyone's emotions and it was compleately overwhelming me. I also worked on putting up some new sheilds, though they're realtively weak and probably pretty pointless. xD;
I really wish I could find a mentor, I'm absolutely no good at keeping myself modivated. =P

I suppose it was eaither good intuition.. or something.. I don't really know.. but I kept being able to guess/influence my nintendo DS game. Not in any drastic way-- but I was always knowing what supposedly random things were going to happen next.. and it's pokemon (LOL, I was bored), so I was 'knowing' what pokemon were going to appear, and i kept knowing exactly when the critical hits were going to be in effect.. stuff like that.. o.x;

Oh, and people kept doing what I thought they would today. But in a strange way. For example, I was walking through the band hall, and there are backpacks scattered everywhere. I see one and instantly feel like kicking it for no reason whatsoever. Right then a person comes up and kicks the same backpack. Almost instantly afterward, i walked up to my band locker and got a mental picture of this girl's bassoon falling, and right after she dropped it. ^^; A couple other things like that happened right afterwards but then it stopped.

And I was thinking... might my empathyness work the other way around too? Or is this guy also empatetic? I don't know. But this guy, Daniel, who is in my band section, came and sat beside me like he always does. And I instantly felt exausted, whereas right before I had be very alert and generally awake. I felt myself dozing off and only realized that Daniel also was tired when the teacher yells "Daniel and Stephanie, please focus!" Well, I asked why he was so tired and he said it was cause he only got like an hour of sleep over the weekend. So, then I realize that perhaps I was only tired because of my empathy. So I "cut off" (I don't really know how to explain it. >>) the linkyness and feel much better. Immediantly afterward, though, so does Daniel. ; Heh.

[Rippy]

May 13

My internet just started working again.

I've been able to use my empathy to manipulate horses into calming down/focusing while we're riding. It's very effective and helpful. It's also been useful when I was volunteering at the wildlife rehabilitation place and I was able to influence the reluctant baby birds into being more hungry for a moment so that they'd open their mouth for me to feed them. xP

Besides that, not much.

[Rippy]

May 14

Recently people continue to ask me why I am a vegetarian. Well.. this is my answer.

Because I want to live a life that stopped no innocent being’s breath. Soul or no soul, they have perception, some level of understanding. But even more important is that they experience emotions. Pain. Sorrow. Terror. And I will do all I can to ensure that my fellow creatures who have purpose beyond my humanistic judgmental standards will never endure pain due to my own selfish desires or craving. I will be merciful, even when the world refuses to follow my example. I will have pity on the powerless.
And what's even more important is I now know my own purpose.
To be not only a voice, but also a soul for my Friends. To be their hands and their eyes and their trust. To either lower my neighbor’s gun or throw myself along the bullet’s path. To learn of them. Their calls and their desires. And their admirations. And then, to teach. Knowledge is the only fuel of sanity, and unfortunately we’re running out of it.
So psi has become a side-hobby. My main goal is aligned with nature, with animals, with the world. Sure, psi is fun, interesting, and amusing. I'll continue to toy with it further. But it is not, by any standard, "me". Nature, however, touches me deeply. The wind's voice strikes a gasp from my soul and the waves a sense of harmony. The simplest mouse, who I just found in the school's hallway, running in terror and confusion, made me proud to bear his presence. And then… his feelings overwhelmed me, and my empathy struck a panic within. For freedom, a strain to sustain my “own” life, the struggle for peace. I then, burying these foreign feelings, had to chase the mouse out the door with a piece of paper so that a fellow student would not crush him. And when he, the littlest vermin who caused the other girls to scream, achieved his freedom, I was proud. Joy mingled with content engulfed my being, and I have realized, in the smallest of forms, that this is what I will do for the rest of my existence.
Save.
I accept my fate.

[.tyler.]

Too bad that mouse is gonna get eaten by an owl in a few days.

[Rippy]

Lol.
Better food for another living being rather than for the trashcan.

[.tyler.]

haha, touché

[Rippy]

May 15--

I did a Shamanic Journey vision thingy a couple nights ago. They're fun. ^^;
I found myself standing before a cave, and sitting quite comically with his tounge hanging out was a small jackel, who seemed to be expecting me.
"Hello," He said, standing. "Are you ready to travel to the Underworld?"
I tilted my head slightly, and just to make sure asked, "You don't mean that silly Christian nonsense of Hell, do you?"
He grinned at me, amused. "Of course not."
"Then yes." I nodded.
He seemed pleased, and without another word trotted into the cave. I followed. I was surrounded by compleate darkness, but kept walking anyway. Eventually I could see a light near the end, growing larger as I drew closer. Upon the exit was what seemed to be the insides of a dark cave, lit only by the dim light of candles. There was no entrance behind me, only crumbling stone, and I could not tell how I arrived. The place was decorated quite cosyily, but sparingly, with a table, a rug, and some chairs. Sitting in the middle of the room was a very fat lady with a wide smile. She seemed to be radiating with Spider energy, though that probably isn't relevant..
She stood, her black-and-red dress wisping around her bare ankles. "Are you ready for the first step in your intination?" She asked quite casually, as if it were a simple everday question.
"Yes." I don't know why I answered that, I didn't even know what she was talking about. I still don't. But anyway, I did.
"Wonderful!" She clapped her hands, her eyes bright, and suddenly I was surrounded by flames compleately.
Suprised, I leapt back from the embers, unsure of what was going on. I heard her voice in the distance say, "Your first test!"
I paused, breathing deeply, and managed to calm my thundering heart. I gathered as much energy as I could and quickly tried to extinguish the flames, lowering them inch by inch until all that was left was their ashes. It was suddenly dark again, but the candlelight was back after a moment. I noticed that sitting before me was an egg. It was orange and white, and seemed to glow with unborn strength.
I picked it up. It was warm to the touch, and about a foot long, yet light. Holding it in the crook of my arm, I swiveled around to face the Spider-Woman.
"What the hell was that?" I asked, frustrated.
She chuckled and answered. "You passed your first test. It was pretty easy, wasn't it? After this it will get harder. Don't fret, you have time to prepare. Come back when you're ready." She smiled at me lightly. I held up the egg.
"What's this?"
"Your second test. Hatch it."
I narrowed my eyes. "What's inside?"
She closed her eyes, smirking, and whistled high-pitched and loud. I winced, it was suprisingly sharp. A sudden warmth took to the air, and I could feel wind strike against my being from behind and above. I looked just to glimpse the bird before it landed upon her shoulder. It was covered in golden-orange flames, shaped like a falcon, with three peathingy colored feathers protruding from its head.
"A pheonix?" I whispered. It was more a statement than a question.
"Yes.. the creature of rebirth, fire, air, as well as many other things.. You will learn much from her.. When you're ready." She smiled. "Goodbye."
I then faded back to normal conciousness and opened my eyes.
Strange, strange, strange. ):

[Rippy]

May 16--

I hit 100 posts today. =)

I fell and scraped my leg up pretty bad and attempted to heal it. I've never tried healing before and didn't really know what i was doing.. but anyway, it stopped the bleeding && pain (Which wasn't much, just a sharp stinging).

I created a psipet the other day. =) It's a ferret who's been programmed to act like a ferret and play with one of my puppies. After about a day it ran out of energy, I forgot to program it to feed off of an unlimited energy source. xD; I'm creating it again tonight, and adding a few more things to it..

Ehh. Not much else..

[Rippy]

May 24
I'm pretty sick today. Headache, occasional off-and-on stomach aches, exaustion, sore throat, coughing, blahblahblah. And it's my birthday nonetheless. xD
I'm bored, so I'll ramble.

It's amazing how much you can learn from nature.. every living thing has something to teach.

Today I spent an hour playing with and observing a random cat. Learned persistance, patience, curiousity, playfulness, and how to be content in every moment.
Before that I spent an hour with Pheonix (my horse) who displayed adaptfulness, bravery, respect, and affection.
Selena, my puppy, teaches playfulness, joy, cuddleyness, energy, intelligence, innocence, and confidence.
Danny, my older dog, taught me affection, the purpose of silence, intelligence, humility, and self acceptance.
I could go on...

And what did my mom teach me today?
Hmm.. how to get a headache and a sense of immense frustration.

[must]

Happy birthday to you!

And to bad your feeling a little ill....

[Mr.Experiment]

Happy Birthday ;D

~Jano

[must]

rippy said:

May 14

Recently people continue to ask me why I am a vegetarian.

no bones no blood.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAnUKSW8hbU

[Rippy]

June 08

Massive headache, sore throat, cough, ect. I'll be okay though. Seeing my bf tomorrow. Finally. Hopefully I'll feel better by then. )':
Started taking art in summer school. (For the credits--duh--i'm not THAT much of an idiot)
We just got back from Florida and my back is peeling. )': Ohwell. At least I'm home again!
Still not practiceing psi-related things as much. More into magick/nature magick/shamanism at the moment.. A little aerokinsis fun around noon but not enough to be considered practice.

I was just remembering earlier.. when I was around seven-tweleve I used to have a process of "blessing" the animals around the lake I lived by every day... I remembered that I slowly stopped doing that... and after decades of ducks living there they started dying.. )': And leaving.. sad. Of course it's just coincidental. It's always nice to pretend little 'ol me could have that much influence, though, right? ;P

I'm going to build a garden. Possibly with an alter inside it. Not a paticulary religious alter or anything-- just one in general relation to nature. Now to find some way to keep my massive alaskan malamute out of it... ):

[leethal]

sorry if i'm bringing back stuff from a long time ago, but what about the plants you eat? i'm sorry. I understand perfectly what you mean, but I think that is only for Your peace of mind instead of the animal's. Cause you can't picture a tree in fright. That's my opinion anyway. You're free to be vegetarian and i respect you and even admire you some, cause you resist temptation from meat (meeeaat)

about your last post, maybe it was coincidental, but maybe you really had some influence. You say you have a natural empathy with animals isn't it so? well then maybe you gained that thanks to that time. And they got some in return. dunno

good work