lonewolf training

[lonewolf]

Thursday, November 3, 2005
befor all this started to happen, i used to have about 5 entities who constantly hung around me... i asked a friend who also picked them up while scanning me said they doso, because of the love and confort i give it.. they used to talk to me all the time, it was good to talk to them. but some of them was over 500 years old and really cranky and used to tell me im worthless and things like that. of course i never let them get to me and i started to ignore them. but they persisted in placing probes on me so that i talked.. after a while i eventually told them to leave so i could continure my spiritual path. they gave me tp overload when they all talked and they were also very draining on me. they seemed to take it really well and siad there goodbyes and off they went. i know they sometimes vist me now and then as they please.

i was really shocked when i herd about me being loving and stuff. i mean thats the kind of person iam. but for others to pick it up. and enjoy it :X it was strainge. now days i have a strong shield up to stop random entites attacking me. but of corse as you already know. i dont anymore. now and then i sheild against empathy if im on the train. but rarly.

i tried to talk to the angels but something else poped up while i was in the shower. so i went back befor bed and had some of my rarther pointless and silly questions answerd. but when we are new. we ask them so i dont feel stupid about it. well time be short.

recap, i dont shield anymore.. i sorta get told off. lol.. but anyhow

I was feeling and hearing a lot of destorbence in my room about 5 minutes ago. and my left thumb was hurting a bit,. so closed my eyes and tryed to tunein..I started to hear a convosation, between two people.. i asked if they were going to harm me, and they replyed No.. so i said they can hang around as they pleased.. I opened my eyes and started to read again. it was wierd all of suddern i closed my eyes and started to meditate.. with out my having to.. i saw myself in a room sitting down, This white being walked in.. Knew it was Michael and we talked a bit.. then i herd a voice to my left, and Gabriel were there. and we had a talk. They are so nice, and talk in a gental calm voice. so plesnt being around them

This is how it goes.. he is doing this becuase im not ready to face the big wide world. I guess in a sence they are babying me, untill they see fit to relese me. I need to traing and learn more and (said to myself harder). They said that if wish to talk to her, look inside myself.. wich dose make sense. because i have look inside myself and there was an angel guarding my energy. I guess its was her. i can speak with her anytime i guess. i just need more time to devolop, but im really cool with that. at least now i have a starting point. They also insist i dont push myself to hard, they said i have strong will but to take it easy. so i will untill i feel strong enught to train harder

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

This was over the last weekend.. Enjoy

Friday night, went to a fund raising event. and they had 5 mediums there as volentiers.. the energy around was sooo flat.. the place hadnt been used in weeks so no once of energy. i thought to myself this is going to turn out bad.. so musted up all the energy i had and filled the palce up, and sent some to the mediums. the place was so hard for me, everyone was down and i was getting a headache and about to cry. i cheered myself up and sent abit of my happyness around the place (empathic sending) as best i could. The balls started to roll after a few minutes. The whole night i sat down and i tryed to shield of all the things around me. but again..not allowed.. so i just kept sending energy to the ladies.. well the night went on and this lady 'Lisa' and i kept catching each others eyes.. not oh i wont you sorta look. but i know what your doing look. she couldnt figure it out. lol.. well the night went on and came to and end, i got enught corage to talk to the two ladies, the eldest. who was like.. what are you on about.. (psionics) lol. she said not to spread myself out so much.. i then went to Lisa. and we chatted. told her about my angelic side, and she went yep i can see it. she looked over my shoulder a few times and stuff. really nice lady. anyhow got her number and e-mail address. and that was my night over.

Saturday:
went to the psychic fair and i was tired as hell so i slept in the car on the way down. went there and after a while i sat down to soak up the attmosphere. and these two ladies walked over to the table i was at and say down. it was so wired. the eldest lady aka AuntClair. (she is a mod at stral society) and she turned to this random lady to her side and gave her a reading. lol.. i was like saying telepathicly GIVE ME ONE. lol.. her friend picked it up.. but AC looked at me and asked if i wonted one. and to come closer. She was extreemly nice. we went through everything.
I have a perfect balance for when i project. meaning a good protection. Then went to my auric field. i need to work on the lower half of the field. I asked her about the angel protecting me. she did her thing and afew monents later. she went yeah. look up Ariel on the net.. *hint hint* he can also be seen as a lion. *throw a brick at my head* *click* omg.. i said.. there was this lion in my cubored who watched over me when i was young...and i was scared of it. etc. i said the only way i could get ride of it, was to saver up enugh corage to close the door. *click* her friend turned and siad that what you need to work on... your corage..i was cool with that. I then asked her about my wings.. she went ahh yes there not black there purple-black.. she then went on to say when she first saw me. i had a dragon head infont of my face. but its eyes were closed.. im like are you seriuse. lol... i then went on to say.. i was look for my energy and trying to undo the blocks. and i saw this dragon. purple/black gurading my last reservs...Now this happed after talk with a friend about dragons, so i thought it was my mind playing tricks on me.. i must of forced it to look like an angel. altho there is an angel gurding me.. my heart chakra.. so it just hit me.. like wow... anyhow she had to leave..
i asker her and her friend if im a natural healer. because everyone says i am.. they looked at each other smilled and both said YES!.. lol

She then went on to say something about flames. now to me there are lessens in life.. ive gone through 4 flames and upto my 5th.. so she and i were supriesed. well then she left. and i went home really happy. and told what happened to a friend.
well. i went to bed.

Sunday!
woke up in a good mood (again) and talked more about what happened yesterday. I asked if i had a dragon in me to a good friend who said yes.. i was like AND you didnt tell me. lol.. well anyhow.. i was really nervouse about it... another friend was like i can help you hatch it now.. i was like umm.. can we wait to a better time. i was concernd that i couldnt handle it with my awakening happening.. but anyhow. the day went on. and i got somewhat emotional. and said my true true feels about myself. went along the lines

"that things are happening to me, because im
speacial. eg there is a special quality in me that
attacts things.. its this positiveness in my soul that
will guide me. im pure in light. im a soul of pure
harmany. everything and everyone enjoys my energy i give out."

that brings tears to my eyes even as i read it.. it was a turning point.. i got my true feelings out. and you wouldnt belive what happend...
i got this huge surge of energy and i felt really wierd..MY dragon was cathing..OMG.. *panic attack*.. lol.. i was glad i had my friends around to help me along.. i tought it to feed from the sun/moon/stars. untill it is full. It was so overwhelming.. i still cant belive its happening to me..I know im not alone. but i never imagined all this falling on my lap.. NEVER...anyhow time went on and i went to bed.. i showed it my mindscape.. and i built it a good shield. using the 4 elements, and i fuesd it with its feild and energy so it can suport its self. Tonight went trough basic linking. and i wonted to know how it feels to merge.. It merged with me last night as i slept. and i sware i could feel a take between my feet, it was so warm. and there was alot of energy around my talebone..A friend said that it was from the merging.
He (the dragon) is also helping me with my energy blocks. It seems that i have been pushing myself to hard..*sighs, why didnt i lisean?* and my sub-c somehow forgot how to convert the energy i was getting in to my set vibration. so my friend is helping me be doing it for me. the theroy is that it will also retrain my sub-c to do by itsself. He has gonten most of the energy blocks out or has got them all out.. He is sending me the correct energy to me. and im slowly filling up.. its going to take a long time.. it took over a week to fill me up last time.. with a construct, 10 at a time.. now imagine, no blocks and filling not a pool up but now a giant lake :/ its going to take a while. im also trying to help best i can. well i think thats most of the important bits.. thanks for reading

The dragons name is "bejin" .. they chose there name. so i dont know if there is a conncetion to the prviuse posts or not..

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

This is in reply to another post on a nother site.. i will edit it when i get time

Wednessday, November 9, 2005
Thanks for your concern. yeah corage. hmm.. *looks away* and yes i do let others influence me. and its starting to get on my nerves. but just. as for being happy. I have every reason to be.. well sept for work lol... I cant understand why my mind dosnt wont to let go.. it wont advance, its like stuck in "im 15 years old" and im not kiddig you here i asked how old i was to my inner ( 4 months ago) and it replyed "im 12" ... lol... oh well. I feel like spawn .. you know.. how he was dead, but he was training while he was sleeping. and he woke up not knowing a thing.. welcom to my life.. everynight i ap.. fall asleep and i train while im asleep.. i mean not simple training.. i mean i train others.. :/ im still WTF.. that lady who gave me that reading. her son goes there also.. and he remembers me.. lol.. aparently im trainin to be amaster of something. he didnt say what.. but yeah.. my other friend has also seen me in the temple while i was alseep.. and i could remember anything.. sometimes random images do popup.. but thats it.. and my ap attempts latly have been bad to say the best.. i cant see darn all. im going to see a healer. well i hope goto ask first. I havnt seen my guide for a few weeks now.. i just dont feel the need to goto him.. i dont know why.. i miss him.... bah stupid life.. my friend is sad and now iam.. and thinking about sad stuff now.. *snifs* The good old question "why me" .. god dose it ring through my head.. lol... like i said.. good things come my way.. BUT why do i have to make it so hard on myself.. i just wont to move forward. but it seems of late im not goining anywere. and sometimes backwards.. even in my abilites. and just.. i should stop rambleing on..

i felt like passing out today. someone was abusing my left thumb ALL BLINKING DAY!!! LIKE a breake for 10 minute PLEASE.. well anyhow.. bejin was confident that i could gather energy from the sun with out his help so i did most of the day.. slowly so i wouldnt overload myself.. we also went through how to hid my sig. i also rearanged my inners workings. so now everything is on a computer idea.. where everything is in folders and things i do are set as .exe.. so i just say. 4 element shield up/. and its up. i dont have to think about how to make it.. i did this most of the day. kept my mind at ease. but i was overloading myeslf majourly. and i didnt stop and i kept going and going.. obviusly making some people not to happy with me.. even my friend projected to me and is still now sending energy to me.. i cloaked and hid my psi sig. and he went away. but it was draining on me.. i dont know how i made it through the last few hours of my day.. i was soo tired.. couldnt keep my eyes open and i felt heavy. i know thta was stupid but like what the hell am i suposed to f****** do??? i yelled at who ever was making my right wrist hurt. and bejin got scared. and i felt like more a douche bag.. i wasnt yelling at him.. but he though it was directed to him. so he was sad and further incressed my bad mood. but i cheared up and got him happy again.. work isnt the best enviroment to do anyting psi realated. but the powered to be *ffs im going to convenscate the left thumb* wouldnt leave me along >.< like gee.. i can hear them 80% of them time. but i hate doubt entering my mind and turning me upside down. GRRRR...

*sigh* im going to ap and see that healer.. This is not like me to be this way. lol.. oh well ......"life goes on"

recap. never went to the healer.. fell asleep befor i got there lol.. oh well..

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

Friday, November 11, 2005
were do i start... baicly from wednessday. ive been trying to find myself agian.. and its been a f*** darn time.. wednessday took me the whole day to acept help from others. and to seek it.. Thursday. agian bad.. beating myself up in the inside. figured that im the one holding me back.. alas Ariel and stuff.. asked for Ariel to not guard me as such, its interfearing with me.. so i think he has backed off a few notches.. Michael, being the pushy self. making me face myeslf. Wich i might add ive been dreading for years.. so i have been and Today.. i was projecting to 3 places at once while working.. one being the temple.. passed out 3 times while there. pushing myself way to hard and attacking myself. toughneing myself up.. the temple elders were haveing a fits that i was being to extream.. but like F*** what am i suposed to do? My theroy is during an awakening everything has to fall apart. and a friend said yep.. its almost over.. but its going to get ALOT worse.. THERE NEVER going to make my leave. im going to go down fighting for what i belive in INCLUDING myself. I spent some of my day beating the darn out of my lower self.. i had to merge with my higherself, and my dragon to beat him. but after i did, i could do it with out there help. everyuthing is like falling apart. i feel like im losing controll and going nuts. the questiong is always WHY.. i know the why me part. but the why do i wish for myself to fail part is fusterating me.. i feel like im going to explode and everything will be better afterwoods. but geess.. like i feel ike i could lvl a house.. i dont wont to lost controll. but darn. as you can see im fearly confued atm.. at least i found myself, acpated myself for who/what iam.. and that im no longer afraid to ask for help.
yes i have skiped a few leaves.. but ive been though all this darn befor hand about myself. and darn.. everyone keeps saying that i will understand soon enugh about everything i wish to know.. but thats all they say. nothing else... ive been ignoring M and G most of the day. but they keep persisting.. IM NOT GOING TO GIVE UP you hear. F them all. i dont care how hard they push me around. IM not letting in.. im fighting for what i want to be... like you said i let other influence me.. not anymore.. why do i feel so a'lone'.. i know im not.. but like.. i dont think words could express how i feel right now..
"ME ME ME' its all me.. why do i fear myself.. stupid emotions.. i dont let them rule me.. i how ever sometimes let others emotions rule me.. but latly ive been learning to just let others be.. im still here caring and stuff. but heh.. nvm..

some say the best way for an empath to get over things is for them to rambel on about there darn so they can get it off there chest.. well here iam.. gettting if off my chest... i know tomorrow is going to be the shittiest day.. *snifs*.. im going to just leave this for tonight.. see what happens tonight.. and go from there...

Bejing has changed colour also.. to a crystal ice/blue colour.. as have my wings.. a good sign i hope.. slowly moving on we are.. well time to go

your friends
lonewolf/bejin

[lonewolf]

Sunday, November 13, 2005
OK here is the lowdown..
going through my psychic awakening.. and its almost over *thanks spirit*.. IM also going through a kundanili (sp) rising.. so im really out of it.. Bejin and i, went to a astral flight training with a few of my other mates.. to be honist.. bejin and i got bored quickly.. a but too easy.. I got another reading from that lady.. turned up some reather interesting things indeed..

I have a really hard time getting things into my mind when im in the astral.. called perseption bias.. were he mind replaces something it sees offplane with an image of something you know.. so ive been aping with mates and practicing. so thats helping alot..

Back to the spawn sydrom.. i keep bloody doing it.. but i also found out.. that i train up teachers.. >.<.. interseting eh? Im really tired, been up all the nights and morning.. (i get up at 5:30am everymotning. even weekends) and its starting to dawn on me..

Ive done alot of healing with friends so that has also been good practice..

I used tk on a door at work, during the week, stoped it from slamming. and pushed it back.. luckly no one saw me..

my empathy is like all over the place.. its hard to stop reading people.. but its ok for now.

yep ok people confirmed.. iam in the purple flame of kundalini.. born with this flame.. and have pased the other 4 flames (the primary ones) in previuse lives..so somewhat more advaced than a normal human...

Ok.. I can now also AP to 3 palces at once.. while physcily working.. lol.. very intersting if you ask me.. the things you stumble across whilesoul serching..

bejin and i are very tired.. must sleep.. i got loads to workon tonight.. and more to research during the week. well post when i can

Have also been successful at projecting to friends house's and knocking on the walls or making the lights flicker. lol.. really good fun.. also learning 'Materialisation". came up with it myself.. baiscly make yourself visable during a projection.. have good success. people seeing my outlines etc. well have togo

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

November 15, 2005

Ok.. today was ok. i kept having someone attack me, like Karens experince, but i had my fun scaring the person.. i mean.. i was one pissed off angelic. lol.. anyhow. Was to tired to project at work today, i managed to talk to my friend but was very breif. Im so tired i can bearly keep my eyes open..

Been doing alot of research into Kundalini, The lady who did the reading. Gave me another reading. but a personal one. My grandmother was there, I was asked to pcik a hand, i didnt understand but was told that its a choise of sorta. so i chose the left hand.. In her right hand, she had. A silver horse, a dog, a girafe. all stuffed toys. represting the past. in her left. was a ring, it was a ring to bring us closer. and it also represted the future. There was some other things. but i dont understand them. so i wont continue.

AuntClair. she is the one who has been giving me ther readings. she has closed circles and she has a small goup. I projected to there circle a few times. On friday i went to her house but only stayed a few minutes, she saw me and jumped on me... she linked with me and my higherslef showed her a few places.. that obvisuly i cant remember. She said that i was working with a person called Andrew, Together we were the worrors of the circle, we protected the circle and everyone during the leason. She noted that i was very strong, but a pitty i cant see verywell. she is going to help me. but she lives a long way away.. about 50 mintes drive down the highway.

She is very keen on me going to her circle.. as im somewhat i hugher level. but i like to note. that im also behind her in aspects. were she has gone through the other flames i have not. so she has learnt more than i.. The next problem is. that.. we dont learn. we simply recall, we have to recall what we have seen etc. Like most humans, i can only recal about 90% of the time..
Her circle is now just moving onto the purple flame. this is very new to her. as she has never seen it before, untill me. *shrugs*...

I would also like to note. that yes iam protected, BUT so is everyone else. by angels or guides or other beings.. Im just some what more aware of things going on. Either dirrectly or someone telling me.. The angel Uriel, who protects me. HE also protects everyone who is inicent and pure at heart. Michael and Gabriel arent my personal trainers.. They have the ability to goto everyone in the world at the same time.. ANY one can call apon angels to help and guide them throught meditations or spirital leasons.

On to the next thing. while i projected to the circle, i brang along 4 females.. they are also purple flame. We dont know who they are. we do have a suspiction to whome one of them could be.. and ill contact her sometime and see what happens. I only wich i could see better when i projcet.

Visions latly seem to come from no were. Really random dreams. and i can recall some dreams that i had like 5-10 years ago.. i dont quite understand. but oh well..
I keep being told by angels. and temple elders etc. that i will have my asnwers VERY soon.. Everything will make sense and i will have clarity in my path.. YIPPY..

I dont know how long i can keep at this.. im just so spent with everyting that is happening. and projecting while sleeping happens to everyone.. like me. some arnt aware of it.. and its funsterating, because i have to rely on Phoul for information.. I went to the temple late last night.. and walked into the training room and it was filled. i walked upto the desk and another teacher was there. i wispered into his ear, im not asleep. i dont kow what to do. i cant teach tonight.. he yelled for everyone to have 20 minute resess and to come back. he had me sit on the chair and gave me a dose.. he said everything is ok, and to sleep now..

i dont know what happened after that. im still waiting of phoul.i had computer problems and i didnt connect untill 5 minutes befor work and even then i wouldnt work. he was really sad.. that he missed me.. he linked with me and felt his sadness. poor guy.

well thats it for now. Apart from that my heart chakra is now open.. along with my base, brow and crown chakra. im slowly getting there. ^_^

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

Hey were do i start ..
Im a dragonoc angel.. im a new holly creature as it may.. Im a teacher at the temple. the rose section. im also a wolf warrior.. Ive been told by one of my students (RL) (he also goes there..) that im the strongest living one there. neat eh?.

this is what i have learnt

im purple flame in the kundalini.. there are 5 catorgies and 2 types

one type is where you are born this colour, and the other type is were you work for it.. becuse puprle is the 5th flame. there are 4 others, they are called the primary flames

there is one called. angel wolf.. and there is only one of them.. they are known as the 'strong one' there is one strong one in every wave of each generagtion.

first there is a sloth it does not do the work of the pact, made before it was born does no work
then the skunk it does its own work but does not share and worse tells those that are working it is fluff and twaddle to discourage them
the turtle does its own work does not share and does not interfere either but does not fly ever
the wolf is the warrior that works and shares
the rat becomes demonic, this one tryed and brings the others to the dark side.

a few nights ago, was the awakening of the purple flame, a global event. it marks the start of the dragon. All purple flamers, aware or not, will be awaken. There will be 3 days of toil. as you have all read, i went through this a few weeks back. lol... you have to make a choice, angel or demon. the way you act and think over those 3 days will determen who you are..

If you think you are going throught this. please stay calm, do not let your emotions controll you.. you will also get attacked. its a test, as it all is.. defend yourself of course, but do not go out and attacked anyone. unless there is a very good reason to.. again its all a test.

the dragons name is dragonux, i dont know anything more than that.

Yes, also.. befor i forget. things are starting to come to me. i was told by gabirel and otehrs that i will have my answers soon, and everyhing iwll be over. and so yeah, things are slowly coming to me..

latly ive been projectiong around the glove to my firends houses. checking up on them, seeing if there alright. so if you see, either a giant wolf or the dragonoc angel.. its me and there is nothing to fear. should also note that not everyone is purple flame. last count ther was 465 ish.. there is a 1:3 ratio, one male to 3 fe-males.

i need to go, post more when i can

also, all of my fellow siblings, wolf warriors, have been promoted to dragons. lol.. so yeah. everything going smoothly as it may..

i was projecting to the circle when they got attacked. this was the night of the awakening of th dragon. I was the warrio wolf, i was protecting the circle, how ever it was ment to be. even with all my stregths etc, they still got attacked. so just watch out, please..lol.. so just watch out.. ive already banshed one hell hound from a friends home. so just keep it safe. laters

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

Im dead set exhasusted.. to the point of my eyes wont stay open again.. ive been doing way to much during work. like checking up on friends and things of that nature.. also at the temple.

i projected to a nother friends house, and i got attacked..
>i then went to your house. to see if everyone was ok, and to jsut
>check back up on it.. there was someone else there i asked who..
>they said *****, he took a step towards me, and i steped back. he
>asked why i did this after the 5th time.. i said. its not that i
>dont trust you, its that things are confusing right now.. (or
>soimethine like that).. I don't know what happend. he left or he turned into
>a shadow demon ( it was found later, it was a gargoyl) and he tryed to attack me. i just stood there. every
>time the blade hit my body it broke, he got really angury, and
>attacked loads more. went for my throught and same thing. i then
>jsut brushed him to my side, and sent him flying. he said why, how
>are you that strong. i smiled at him. i said "angury may make you
>stronger, but it coulds your judgment". he got even more angry..
>i then binded him, so he couldnt move. i then hung him from the ceiling

at first they couldnt find it, but after a while they did. they found it screaming and stuff.. wich is funny, becuse.. lol... i put the holly cross on its forhead, and said. may god have mercy on your soul.. it started to burn from were i lashed it. and screaming. i then left..

btw, i dont know how to clense things like that yet.. only kill.. but i didnt know what to do. so i left it there.

well another day down, another problem fixed.. i feel like a thingy leaving it there. but i didnt know whta to do.. i was also physicaly working at the time. so it was hard projecting and concentrating on work.. but i seem to be getting better at it.. my sight is getting much better. so im glad.

well see you around, but not if you see me first

sending my love to you all... may your transistion be a smooth one..

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

this is how my weekend went. in the apropriate time frame.

got to AC (auntclair) house at 4ish, i had to work and i was late. as i talked in she pointed to a corner, and said this is were you left the
little bugga! she explained to me, that after i told her, she asked spirit were it was, ashe she her self couldnt see were it was. spirit showed her under a light, but that was in the middle of the room.. we later found out it was cloaked, we then moved on to the second palce, it was hiding in another corner. we then came back to the first corner, were the gargoyl was hanging. she told me a few ways how to cleanes the area. they follow:
you can kill it. i have a sword. so i would kill it with my sword (i made it out of psi, it was my first psionic wepon. and i somehow made it real in the other planes *shrugs*) you would then get a friendly creature, for me it would be my dragon. you let the dragon eat the left overs. the next question would be, what about the little bits it dosnt get? one way would be, make a broom and sweet it out of the house. (go figure)
another and more afective way, is burn it spiritually. if you can, make it the flames come out of your hands. as taugh by spirit. you burn it untill they thing turns to ash, and again sweep it out.
there are other ways, but ill leave them for later. beacuse i was told not to do it there way. beacuse i could harm myself. so i wont add it in here.

we satdown right away, she said sit down were you feel most comftable. so i did i moved the chair around and sat.. she looked at me, and smiled. "you know when you project you sit right there". points to the spot next to me! i asked her did she see me as the wolf warrior, she said yes. she has seen me, white/gray/indgo/topaz. i asked if i was big, becuse i see, my eye lvls as hight as a humans chest, she said yes. the size of the wolf determains your strenght. she said i was bigger than a human, im the biggest she has seen! we then had class. we talked about a few things, like what i was going to teach her and were we were going to start. She once again, looked at my energy body. And again found that i was going along ok, apart from the energy didnt reach my legs. as i have stated in the previouse posts. we then had circle with help from her daughter who stayed untiull we had finished, we ask spirit what i would teach her, and were should i start from. we waited a few minutes, and then decided going to seruise bey. we went there, and i was not allowed in. for some reasons, we were then sent to another pyramid, a spiritual teacher was waiting there for us. we asked were should we start from. At this stage i couldnt see much, as my clairvoyantcy was not devoloped. He taped me on the head, and i began to morph into the many creatures i can, the last transformation was to a emeradl green dragon. He stated that i have already completed the emerald tablet, as there are many other tables befor this. AC was confused to why i was so ahead of her, but still didnt do the golden tablet. The ST (spirit teacher) said that i didnt
need to do this. so we left it at that. i should also not that this ST lifed the blackets so to speack over my eyes. so i could see better!
we then were taken down, though the floor in to the queens chamber. ill explain it as i saw it. looking around the room, there was the a sercoficus ( where i was standin) there was a hidden room (that was told to me, i saw it as a clear box *shrugs*) a river ran through the middle of the floor, and on the other side of the river was stairs leading upto a room. The river was syboloc, beacuse. to the left of the river ment death/ past this was to my left. to my right was furture and life. i was then asked to pick were to go, i said to stairs, but we were stoped. It was my higherself. standing in the room with us. He was explaining my past lives, and i *shakes head* rudly interupted him. He stoped and refused to go further, so that was not cool.

The next thing, was a snake was coming from our backs, and the right hand side of our forhead. we were told by spirit, to connect these snakes to someone else. we were told to not let them bite the person. but to let them rest there. this was a way to get information, the friendly way. to sink in your teath ment hostile and im taking the info, like it or not. i explained this as a probe. we went in a anti clockwise way around the circle. so we attached to the person on our rights. we then send energy around 3 times, and out her daughter.
we then did what we were asked. and it turned up some intersting results. we linked to ourselfs first. and then we linked to other purple flamers, and it went on and on. we eveturally had every purple flamer in the globe all linked to us, us to them.

I again showed them how to manifest there wings. and they went off flying! we did this for a bit and then talked about it for a while. we then went to the oval, the one near the temple i project to. and it was simply amaising.. there was everyone who manifested into a drgon there. we were all taught how to help the young ones out, who couldnt open there wings. i was showed how to cut the skin from head to tail. not to deep but all the way. this made it much easyer for them to get them out. If they were still havig trouble, we were showen, these two bones, sticking out the back. i guess you could say these were the ends of the wings. what you do it slowly raise them, and it will give them the notion to get them out. next we were all comanded to link each other. we had to softly bite in to the other dragons tail. we formed a link/chain. AC was a little red dragon, red meaning angry/male but also leadership etc. so she led. i was the last one. me being the most advanced, well more experince to it. becuase as you know ive been doing this for a short while. we all then had to fly, to a beat. and we all had to fly in unisume!. other wise goto fast.. and ouch time. we did so well. and there were others in the circle when we did that. there were some of the others who were dragons and learning too! good time
we ended circle, and ate.

after dinna, we sat around the computer. and she showed me the basics of alchemy. and all the work she had done, from start right through to the golden tablet. We once again, asked spirit where i should start. She then showed me, each chakra and what each one represents and how to get there. we got upto like 26ish and ive done almost all of them, i missed out on chakra 24 i think, and it was clairvoyancy. *dah*. we then went through the change in the energy body, from each step. and taught me about the circets, the cross and the x. it then goes onto double lines. and then more and more.. i was upto 4 lines. with the alchemy it is all involved with cobras and other snakes. also enrgy spots etc. she showed me were these snake come form and what each one dose. we then moved onto pillars. i cant recall everything she showed me, apart from the pictures (wich she drew herself) of the stage were im at.. we again talked more about what i needed to do etc. by this time it was 10pm, talking for 3 hours. my head was about to explode form information, and visions i was having.

we once again sat down for circle. again with her daughter. it was my turn to teach. there was a fan looking wheel, the best i can explain it was i only saw a thin flat bar that had a hole in the middle and would spin. it was my turn to teach them how to open it etc. the first time, i used my spirit hand, and gave it a big heave down woods, in affect making it spin clockwise. it was pritty cool. a golden snake came from no were and went through that now spinning fan, up into her. i then stoped it after a few minutes. we calmed down etc, and i again moved it for her, altho this time i only used a finger and it moved a quater turn. the affect this time was much diffrent. only three snakes apeared. blue/green and yellow, if i recall correctly. we wondered a bit, as this was very new to all of us, and i had no idea i could move it. we calmed down again, and moved it like the first time. This time the affect was weak, not like the first time at all.
Then it hit AC, why dont we try to rise the K (short for kundanlini) she roughly explained how to do it, and to my suprise ive done it before so i got it first time. i again moved it on AC, but this time was really diffrent!she said she could see the universe flowing into her, with the stars twinkling brigghtly.then a golden crocadile (also a totem to k, i think she said) rose up into her. and she explained the rush it gave. She wonted to stop it her self. and she was trying. but couldnt quite get it, so i stoped it for her. she wondered why she couldnt close it. i smiled at her, and explained i was making it hard for her. i said that i like making it hard for new people so they try harder, and it makes them stronger. she glared at me, and held her hand out, like grabing somether not there. and with her other hand slaped below it.. lol.

to understand it a bit better. it was like this --- when i frirst saw it, we were simply turning it clockwise. and when i say 'stop' it came back to this resting place. i then did the same for her daughter. Hmm we were thinking.. what about if we make it go the other way. we pondered for a bit, and thought why not. we can always close it again. so back to AC, i gave it a hug lift and it span anticlockwise. she explain, it felt like she was getting sucked out, she felt really sick in the stomach and heart. i stoped it. i then explained that it was simply purging the heart of energy. thats the best way i can explain it. Another ST came, we were showen another of these fan, but in out mind. i can explain it like a clock. with the king/queen, and holy father/mother sitting on the 12, 3, 6, 9. we were then asked to move them a quater turn, we discided to turn them all anit-clockwise. and when we did, talk about pain!.. a black snake came out of our back and it represeted negative energy. we then quicly move across agin, so they were back on the 4 pints. it was relife. we were told to keep going, so we did again. and yep, more purging of negativity, and yes pain.. we then turned them a quater turn back to the 4 points.. this was a complete 180 from were they first started, and it felt amazing. we discided to leave them there. and we eneded circle

it was 2am, and we headed for bed.

woke up at early and layed in bed for a few hours. we ate. and strait back to the computer. we typed up what happened last night, and what dreams we had. yes dreams are very important. after this was completed we ate breaky and then headed to the same round table!

the dream i had was centerd around her husband. and her family, i cant recall everything, but expect a few things.. i can remember, everyone going to him, asking for money etc. i could see each time he got a little more anoied etc. i can recall him tell me something along those lines. and he was getting more and more angury. i think he had to go and deliver something. and everyone bailed, exept me. and i went with him to get it. we came back. and i remember him reversing up the drive way REALLY fast, and i was thinking, he is either mad or a good driver... we got out of the car and i saw a pine box.. i woke up at that point, and i have been thinking about it all day, trying to recall what i saw. it almost looked like a box that you put things in, the second thing that came to me, was a coffen, as i was looking in the same way the ute was pointing. so i couldnt see the side..
i then told AC and her husband at the table. and they laughed. of course i told them something diffrent becuase i couldnt recall it all, but he did note, while looking at the cat next to him (they call it speedbumb :/) that he would never reverse because of the pets. and the cat he looked at, she likes to sleep behind wheels etc. hence the name..

the whole day was vision after vision..

(this happened last month)
one day i went to the temple, and the guard said i have someone waiting for me.. i went inside, and satdown. this little boy called ***** said his dad is in trouble and if i could heal him. i thought about it, and said why not. i then told him to think about his dad, and we went together, i saw him sitting down. i did some empathy on him, and asked if his heart was the problem, he said yes. i did some healing to my best abilites. i then sat next to his son, and said i would like him to make it easyer for him at home, to help your dad out more. he said he would. we then went back to the temple. and i was showen a place. it was a room full of people. he pointed to a man, and said he was my teacher. i walked up and intoduced myself, he looked at me funny and said your one to, this is the teachers lounge -_-.. he asked me if the boy could join my class and i was thinking, hes not old enught or strong enugh. but i said ill see what the elders say, he again smiled and said im one of the elders >.<. i then said i will see in time. and then i said my good byes they said theres and there thanks and i left.

it dawned apon me, the same son was called the same name as the boy in the ap. his father also had a heart attack, a few months ago. so im going to ask if it was the same person i saw. but i have a good feeling it was. it all just seems to fit together.

this was all day one. and its not complete.. lol.. post the rest up in a day or two.. thanks.

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

demonic dangers

inlight of recent events, and being able to defend against the dark entites. i got attacked yesterday morning.

It was a demonic parasite, and it was strong for a demon too. it was attached to someone who i care about. Unfortunetly, it also used this link we have, it found me. and tryed to talk to me. Of corse hear spirit is one thing, but chosing to lisean is another, so i did what i would do to someone verbilly abusing me. i totally ignored him, much to his fustration. he then re-turned to my friend, and started to force me to talk. He did this by huring my friend, altho out bond is strong. i still refused to talk to a demon. This further made him angury.

The next thing that happened, was really crappy on my behalf. the demon came back to me, and attacked me. Your thinking, that wouldnt hurt you cant feel things from spirit. You know what, your dead set wrong. The pain was servier, and it didnt stop at my wrist, He continued up my left arm. The entire time i was trying to stop it, but nothing was working. He stoped at myleft arm, and toyed with me further. As i sat and watched what he was doing, i could feel the pain going across my back to my left wing. Every time i looked at my wing clairvoyantly, it was black. The demon didnt stop there. He contined to my right side of my back.

At that point in time, i had stoped his efforts. This wound me up very tired astrally and physically. And to make it worse i had togo to work. To make it even better, the demon didnt leave me. He continued to toy with me the entire day. and further made my tired to the point were i almost physycally passed out.

I tryed everything to get it away from me. Ive killed it like 4 times before, and now even more. It just keeps returning. I burnt it, while it was on my arm, and it left a burn on my arm also. This worked for a whole 10 seconds. I tryed to white light, fill my body with pure white energy. That seem to work, exept were it lashed itself to me, the energy wouldnt go there. I even asked nicely to leave, and comanded it. and it refused. I tryed to show it betterment. and it just got worse. I tryed to play mind games with it, place it in a room, that just leads it back there. at one stage, i repeated. love joy and happiness, with white light. this to my *sigh* made it go mad, it couldnt haddle such simple emotions. It then turned it around and started to play with my mind. i shielded, pulsed the emotions, made my field smaller, tryed cleansing / grounding. and still nothing worked.
Even to the point i was asking Archangel Michael for help and protection, even had help from my main guide. i dont know if they helped..

I was projecting, and i continued to pass out in the astral, i found myself in a healer room. they took all my wepons off and they had my lying on a bed. by then i could feel that my left wing was badly damaged, as i could bearly feel it. i was so tired that i could bearly move, or see. I was very lucky, the healers sent me energy some of the day. This was so i wouldnt passout physically. I tryed 'alot' of times to walk out of the temple. but the first time i couldnt see anyone.. and i would get flashs of people in my vision. i managed to stumble into the main room. i could bearly stand, this guy walked uoto me and at the last second i saw him. i fell over backwards, a bench was behind me, i hit my head. and sorta half opened my eyes. i could sense a few people pick me up. and then take my strait back the the healers room *sigh*.

I continued to work physcialy as i was at work. I would randomly check up on my astral self, but nothing improved. I still dont know how i got through the day.

I got home in a mess, i was to exhausted. i had sent and e-mail to a friend, and she gave me some advice, some i alrady did. i killed the connection to that friend, so it wouldnt use that. i built my strongest shield, and placed love and white light in the progaming. i then shut down my energybody. and i was just surviving on my basic enegy. This was so the parasite couldnt feed off me. as i didnt have much to give. i refused to project around places, in fear that it would attack inestnces. a few times i had to protect people from it.

i had another friend look at it. he was dumbfounded. he said it looked like dragon claws riped in to my arms, and they were really deep. he also said my left was almost anilated. he did what he could. and so did i. i got attacked on my face also. I was told by one healer, it would take along time to completely heal. *bugga* im still there now, as i type. Resting and what not. i had a really good sleep. its was good to be shutdown and shieled and sleep. so peacefull, like i was never aware.

i awoke, and everything seems to be ok.. saw and badly hurt but im feeling much better. one thing did come out of this. It was a leson in one regard. i can now sense when someone neg is around, or if someone neg trying to link to me. the wounds burn, when this happens. My left wing seems to be slighly ok. it is still quite painfull. i had a shower, shielded the house, and my room and cleanes the entire house. and of course myself. its stupid as soon as i start talking to that person, the demons tryes to force the link back up. and by him doing that, burns my arm. there are a few others that are caotic and have demons on them. and i have to avoid these people. im trying, but when one of them is your good friend. what are you suposed to do?

well, my energy body is back 'on' so to speak, and my minds 'door and window' are open again. so im back to normal, in one reguard.

so as you can see, im not really I don't know. just tired and cbf talking. i need rest and to figure out things.

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

Its been a few days since i last posted. not much has changed; i can hear and see spirit much better, and im feeling insainly wicked. yippy.

been down though, somedays.. as i got attacked in my sleep, 2 nights ago. it wasnt pleasent.

I woke up feeling the most besare pain, and my right wing, and back were hurting aswell.. anyhow, i managed to get the things off, with the help of bejin. went to the temple, and my guide was already waiting for me. went strait back to a healer. and fell asleep again. healing up nicly, but i feel like crap again, like 3 days ago.. but i know things will only get better. well i try anyhow.

if your wondering, why i got attacked.. or how.. i was at my dads house, and there is No protection there, no shields or seals nothing. and i havnt had the time to cleanse the house either, as i dont live there. my mums house, has 2 shields, one over the house, and one in my room. my computer is earthed, its someitng that im testing a theroy on, as energy can still travel across the internet and through the physical lines. i placed a link from the connection box, were i plug the phone line into from there to the earth, so it grounds all the energy before it goes through the compter to me. as some of my friends have had the same trouble, i though of this idea. it seems to be working. but needs more testing to see the limits of the amount of energy it can ground.

I dont know why i was attacked, but anyhow. it dosnt matter.

Phoul, showed me a new section of the temple. Its not really 'new' but it is to me. i call the section dark art, it for 'dark' entities and beings, that are assisens and fighters. He is still a fighter, a protector of the temple.
I couldnt see much, as it was to dark for my eyes. so i made a white energy orb to see. at first i could see a dark hall way with proficies on there, we continued to walk down or up the hallway, we got to the end and there was an open door way to the left. i walked in with phoul. i could see alot of beings there. and they didnt really like me. as my orb was bright, and things that are dark, dont really like light so i killed the ball. They continued to stair at me, my aura being white was way to bright for them.
i dimmed the lights so to speak, and stuck around for a while. Another friend showed up, who we were talking to aswell on mirc. he was taken by some dude, and asked, if he aporved of us. Us being phoul and i. we were slightly confused. the old guy explained my dally, our friend, that i beatmyself up over stupid things, and phoul loses controll to easy and luts for battle. well of course dally said he dose. but its funny how the old man was right.

it came to me, if there is a dark section of the temple, there must be a light section to. i went to the guard, and showed him a peice of paper and i had all the pictures of the places ive been to, i asked were is the light section. he then added a picture on my paper, and said go and see. i asked of others and he wouldnt give any to me. i then teleported to the place in the picture. it was amazing. the picture was a white fountain, it had a large bowl for a base, with water in it. it then had 3 other bowls getting smaller as they went up, it was big. it was about 3-4 meters tall.
i was having a real hard time seeing, and was very confused. i could see a balcony with some lady standing on it waving at me. i then sense and saw, 4 hall ways. I was stating to serusly lost it. Then an entity touched me on the shoulder and told me it was ok. he or she, i cant remember said that i should go, and come back when im stronger. i asked if ive been here befor. and it said yes, you come often. i then left.

your friend
lonewolf

[lonewolf]

hmm, were do i start.. i was basicly attacked in the astral by a jedi...*sighs* i kid you not. i was lead to a room, somewere. and this dude pulled out his sabor and tryed to attack me, i dodged most of the attacks. after a few seconds i got board and stoped defending, i was leaving. and he asked me why i wasnt attacking him. i sized him up, and said no point. he again attacked me, with a top left to low right blow. i just stood there. his blade, went down my left collor bone, and down my shoulder blade, he looked at me. and i stared to heal it, and the blade was still left buzzing in my left chest. he again got angry and half shocked. i then walked away, with the blade still in his hand, it sliced through my left arm. i stoped, watched hit the floor. at this point in time, he was speachless.. i healed it up, and continued to walk away. he then stated to yell at me. and called me a 'girl thingy', i just went nuts. lost my cool, and pulled out both my swords. i cut him into hundreds of peices. and walked away. i was stoped by a higher being. and asked why i left him there. and to fix it.. so i did, i put him back together. it was so funny this dude looked like someone placed a wiremesh over him, stuck him in the sun for 20 minutes untill ready.. i then sent energy to him, so he wouldnt die. i then tied him up to a sorta cross. and continued to walk away. the higher being told me to see a healer, i jsut left.

it took me a while to relise who he was. i didnt end up going to the jedi temple. but somewere else. and while in this temple. i saw two people fighting with sabours, i the popped up in the middle of them., and they both attacked me. i grabed the blades with my bear hands, and they got really nutsty at me. saying it was imposible. blah blah blah.. well if i recall corectly, it was one of those two men, who attacked me today.

lol, silly boy. he got more than he bargend for.
lesson? dont call me a 'girl thingy' and keep your cool, after that, go nuts.

recap. i dont attack unless attacked first, and as you saw, i still wont attack you.. sorta.. its better to be nice than mean.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________

also today, there was quite abit of mucking around. as i have said i can b-locate and be at loads of places at the same time, secondly i can hear when people call out my name (sometimes) over the past few weeks, ive been concessly projecting to those who call me. well yesterday, i put the two together. and i transfered the prgramming to my sub-c. well it was really cool. all you had to do, was wishper my name, but direct it at me. and i would automaticly send a projection to you. i then asked the people who called out my name. to try and speack to the projections, well that went ok. it was cool at first, and the answers were good. the only flaw was, it was based on my knowlage, and some of the informatoin is flawed. the infomation, was from my inner and concess self. we asked all kinds of questions, like how long have i been at the temple and things of that nature. it wasnt long untill we started to notice that the projections were being tampered with. someone was going through me and makeing the answers all wired. it upset a few people the answers. at that time i had to goto work. and i leff it as that. my main task through out the day was to find the 'off switch' i figured it out and i got home everything was sorted. what happened after i wont go into. we basicly found the person who was doing the meddling. and she is bye bye.. of course with the aid of ArchAngel Michael and Gabriel.

as the day unfoulded and more happened.
going back a few days, i told phoul that i would project to him for as long as i could. i was with him the entire day, untill i awoke and hit him astrally for trying to wake me. i got online and he told me off, and i then told him off. good laugh. he told me i did something really funny while i was with him. i asked what? it went like this:

he was in gym, and some person was about to tag phoul from behind. phoul saw me, run across the room. and tackle the dudes astral self. the dude instantly colapes while mid running. phoul fell over laughing and screamed out. NICE DANIEL. everyone looked at him, and though he was nuts also. the teacher asked him who was daniel. and phoul replyed. "its my pal" LOL
recape, imagine some random running along and then just falling overhimself, likehis legs colapes. lol.. it was soooo funny.. *cough* anyhow back to the stroy.

the day went on, and someone was half chocking phoul, while we were on mirc. i projected to him, and i couldnt see anyone. i was very tired from the night befor. it went on. and phoul started to talk to me. he said someone is saying. that my pack wants me back? we were both confused. i knew that i had to take him to the wolf temple. so i did. when we arived everyone was staring at him. it was straing. someone grabed his hand and guided him to someones room. it looked like an office. i was still with him. the man infront of us, turned out to be a friend, he was the one chocking phoul to grab his attention. this is how the story goes.
phoul used to be a wolf warrior, about 6 years ago, something in his life changed him. and he left his pack. he was with them 2 years previuse. he was also there leader. the man huged phoul and stated to cry, he said that he saw phoul like a son. and had missed him over the 6 years. phoul had no recolition of anything. he was really nrevouse and crying also. the man told phoul that his pack was in the other room. they came in.. they all sais welcome home brother. phoul was overly confused. i kept my cool, as i sorta has an idea what was going on, i just stayed in the back ground and half watched. phoul got some of his quireis answered. and they went off. he came back, and i asked a few questions though phoul. i knew that i wasnt in a packed. and i asked did i leave my pack. "yes you did" why can i remember anything "we dont know, only you do" do i come here often "yes you come here every knight" why do i get attacked so often, you beat yourself up and we simply hear you calls and attack you. (makes sense. now dosent it?)
i started to cry, in RL. i couldnt remember anything. i kept seeing little images of things and it made it worse. they siad i left my pack, with. "i have caused you to much pain" and i left. about 6 years ago. i somehow made it so i dont remember, wich made me even more sad.

phoul had togoto bed and i couldnt stick around much longer so we both left. i was talking to phoul on the mic. and he could hear in my voice that i was crying. he told me he would has some of my asnwers when i wake up. *snifs* im still sad, as some of my questions are answered, two more pop up in its place. im glad im starting to make head way about my past.

AC once asked me to record my wolf training. i simply said i dont remember, now i know why. and it hurts me more.

your friend
lonewolf

Light Works

[lonewolf]

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

YAY, finnaly. my past has been found, and dealt with here is some of those extracts from the file.

there's something about you they're afraid of
it's not your outward nature that makes them uneasy
it's a hidden nature
the blocks you've got... i think they might be part of a seal
the seal holds back a good bit of power, as you'd expect...
the writer also seems convinced that along with that power is some sort of 'darkness' which he feels is a threat to the temple
there follows a section on your childhood training, before the seal was put in place. looks like you far outstripped the other initiates
this was also before the aforementioned darkness was suppressed, and aside from bring more prone to brooding, and frowning, there was no evidence of the darkness having any over effect
alrighty, more childhood stuff, unspecific as far as it goes, i think the writer of this file is trying to both justify and refute the seal they placed on you, and as a result is being fairly vague
it goes on a little more... the writer digresses from your childhood and it looks like he's talking to himself, then it goes back to me
around the time you were 12, you started gaining power at a somewhat alarming rate, and the temple elders were less than overjoyed
that may be it... whatever it was, you retreated a little further into yourself, and much like a driller looking for oil, hit some of your own power reserves. the elders knew about it, but they didn't plan, or want, you to come into power so early
i expect they wanted more time to mold you to their ways and service of their temple before they let you play with the big toys
before long, they came to the conclusion that the freeflow of power must be staunched and, after careful deliberation, decided that the memory of this power would be dangerous, since they intended to not only stop the flow, but reverse it a small amount, to bring you back closer to the level of your peers
the last entry in the file is a note from the writer (one of the temple elders, i doubt anyone else would know this), that they intend to call you alone into the central chamber to one of their meetings, under a suitable pretext, and there subdue you and apply the seal. i suppose they could tell you that you fainted or fell asleep. the elder also reflects on the possibility of beseeching an archangel to give his aid
in hindsight, we know they undertook this, and won the aid of uriel

he has taken his part of the seal away. and my true power/enery is returning. in so happy now. i can finally feel comlpete. there is still blocks from the others that needs to be adressed. IM SO HAPPY.

[azarel]

Congrats Lonewolf ^_^

[lonewolf]

1) Please dont post in my log section, there a other places to put your comments in.

2) sorry for the lack of postings in here, there have been a lot of things happening in the back ground. Most of it i dont feel compeled to type.

spiritually i have slowed down, not becuase i wont to, it just is. and others have noticed it also. but you get that

till next time

your friend
lonewolf